2011 Grammy Awards Live (Sort Of) Blog
February 13, 2011
Well, it’s another year of blogging the Grammys. Luckily, I don’t think I’ll need much more than one or two cups of coffee. I’m pretty awake this time. And I hope to see my favorite track from the time period, Empire State Of Mind win some awards tonight.
There is no host for this year’s show. I was hoping that they’d bring Arsenio Hall back to reprise his MTV Music Video Awards hosting gig. Sadly, that’s not happening.
Looks like it’s Aretha Franklin Appreciation night. I wonder if someone drives up in a Pink Cadillac?
(I’ll be cherry picking my favorite Grammy tweets of the night and adding them.)
8:04PM – Christina Aguilera, fresh off a National Anthem disaster with definite mother’s milk boobs going on, decides to wail alongside Jennifer Hudson and Martina McBride on Natural Woman. I think Florence Henderson is up there too. Wait, that’s the girl from Florence And The Machine. My bad. Hey, I think Yoli Adams is up there too.
8:20PM – All five girls are back on stage to give out the best Pop/Duo/Group Grammy. Yoli Adams is Manute Bol to Christina Aguilera’s Mugsy Bogues. Train won with Hey, Soul Sister, if anyone cared.
MissLove32
Rihanna looks like she’s wearing christmas wreathes as a dress.
8:23PM – Lady Gaga is out performing her new song, Born This Way. It sounds so much like a Madonna song that Alex Rodriguez nearly jumped on stage mesmerized.
gidget
Now I have Hey, Soul Sister stuck in my head. DAMN YOU, GRAMMYS.
8:34PM – Miranda Lambert looks like Paris Hilton if someone fed Paris Hilton.
8:51PM – Hmm, I think Bruno Mars may have forgotten to put gel in his hair.
8:53PM – Janelle Monae’s hair looks like an afro-puff diving board. She kinda tore it up though.
9:09PM – Justin Bieber is transitioning into Joey McIntyre right in front of our eyes. My eyes are tearing up.
9:10PM – To counter Justin Bieber and Jaden Smith, Will Smith and Jazzy Jeff should’ve joined them and showed them a thing or two.
9:11PM – If you’re Usher, do you just piggyback on Justin Bieber for the rest of your career? Just go back to Chili, find out what she wants, and let Bieber rake in the money for you homie.
knbrmurph
Big ups to the rapper B.o.B. for rocking the monocle at the #Grammys. But Mr. Peanut called. He wants his look back.
9:22PM – Jealous of Beyonce and Nicki Minaj for their bodacious badonkadonks, Lady Gaga is wearing external butt pads. Doesn’t work like that home girl. You weren’t born that way.
WhitneyCummings
Does Donnie wahlberg know he’s not blind?
9:31PM – I wonder how many times Bob Dylan tries to clear his throat before he’s just like, “Argh! Forget it!”
9:32PM – If I were Jakob Dylan, I’d change my name to Jaden and hope my dad put me in a song or something.
liss98
I can’t believe Kate Hudson let that dude from Muse touch her, much less knock her up. Eeek. Then again, Chris R. was skeevy, too.
9:45PM – I think the Jersey Shore crew should cover Lady Antebellum’s Need You Now and rename it, D.T.F.
girlwonderful
Oh, I just saw Cee-Lo, y’all didn’t tell him he dressed up as the NBC logo.
9:49PM – If Gwyneth Paltrow had boobs, I’d be turned on by her outfit right now. But at least she can sing a little bit.
steveaustinBSR
is koko b. ware at the grammeys?
10:05PM – I’m pretty certain that John Mayer has a bet with his friends that he can look as scraggly and unkempt as possible and still pull chicks.
10:15PM – Hey, it’s the claymation version of Eminem. Wait, that might be the real Eminem.
10:19PM – Dr. Dre’s going to need a doctor to bring him back to life unless he gets off them steroids.
10:40PM – Who knew that one of the oldest cats on stage would give the liveliest performance. If I was wearing a cap, I’d tip it to you Mick Jagger. Instead, I’ll tip Janelle Monae’s afro-bangs.
10:50PM – True story – my mom’s go-to song in karaoke was Barbra Streisand’s Evergreen. But it was before there was karaoke.
10:53PM – Eminem needs to give his Grammy to Questlove, or at least buy my man a platinum afro pick.
MissRiza
Turned to the Grammy’s just in time to see Nicki Minaj’s outfit…good to know I didn’t miss much! #hotmess
11:04PM – Lady Antebellum beat out Jay-Z and Alicia Keys for Record Of The Year and I haven’t been this angry since Huey Lewis And The News got jobbed out in 1986 by We Are The World.
11:22PM – I think I saw Eminem with a sign that said, “If Lady Antebellum wins, we riot!”
11:23PM – And the winner of the biggest award, Album Of The Year goes to Arcade Fire. Where’s ODB when we need him? Wu-Tang is for the children!
2010 MTV Video Music Awards Play By Play
September 12, 2010
Chelsea Handler
Refresh every 15 minutes or so as I’ll be updating the blog as much as possible.
I don’t know Chelsea Handler’s work well, but she has a little bit of buzz because of her talk show on E! and I guess that’s what happens when you get some buzz. You host the VMAs.
- An Eminem performance to start the show? You sure are not very predictable MTV.
- What I find hilarious about Not Afraid is that baseball players and fighters everywhere use it as their batter walk-up/entrance music. Don’t know they it’s about an addict who is trying to make a comeback? Or are they saying they’re former addicts?
- I wonder if MTV knows that Recovery is a terribly overrated album?
- I swear, if Chris Brown shows up on stage with Rihanna for Love The Way You Lie, I’m never watching MTV again.
- Ok, he didn’t make it on stage. Thank the lord.
- So far, Chelsea’s monologue consists of making fun of Taylor Swift, black rappers, Justin Bieber, and The Jersey Shore. In other words, it’s pretty lame.
- At least one thing that Ellen DeGeneres got out of being a judge on American Idol is that she’s a presenter on the VMAs. I’m not sure that was a step forward in her career. Did Oprah ever do the VMAs?
- Lady Gaga won the first award for Bad Romance and she walked up on stage wearing a peacock hair-do, looking eerily similar to Ellen DeGeneres’ faux hawk.
- Is it bad of me that I’m rooting for Paramore to win the best rock video all because of my girl Hayley Williams? Damn, they lost. 30 Seconds To Mars won.
- Kim Kardashian just introduced Justin Bieber. Too bad her boyfriend Miles Austin is sad that his Dallas Cowboys lost on Sunday Night Football. Ok, it’s not that bad that they lost. In fact, that made me kind of happy.
- Justin Bieber is lip-syncing the hell out of Baby. He’s pulling a Joey McIntyre on us since his voice is probably changing on him these days. It’s about time.
- He segued into Somebody To Love and I was just waiting for Usher to try and steal his swag. I also find it cute that whenever Bieber’s done with his performance, he ends with a drum solo just to show that he knows a little bit of music.
- Don’t you just hate it when people use the word “myself” when they’re supposed to use the word “me”? I’m looking at you Trey Songz.
- Remember when I jokingly said that I was waiting for Usher to steal Justin’s swag? Guess who’s performing next? I’ll give you a clue. His name starts with a U.
- My man can still dance his tail off. He definitely owes a lot to MJ for the way he moves, but at least it’s not a complete jack like Chris Brown.
- If Nicki Minaj doesn’t make it in rap music, she has a career in modeling for Apple Bottom jeans. Holy cow, you could see it from the front. She might as well change her name to Nicki Badonkadonk.
- Florence Henderson is in a new group called Florence Henderson + The Machine? Isn’t she too old? What? It’s just Florence + The Machine? My bad.
- Lady Gaga just won Best Pop Video and is wearing an outfit that reminds me of Missy Elliot’s rubber ball suit. She won for this video:
- Taylor Swift is singing a song that might be inspired by the Kanye West fiasco from last year that I still believe to this day was party rehearsed. She should’ve gone the Justin Bieber route and lip-synced. She must be going through puberty too. Or else, her voice just isn’t very good.
- Mary J. Blige is making my ears happy after Taylor Swift made them so sad.
- And the Best Hip Hop Video goes too… B.o.B.! Woohoo! Ok, you knew Eminem really won.
- Take J-WOWW’s boobs and Nicki Minaj’s rear end and you have a pretty cool comic book character.
- Bruno Mars is on stage lookin’ like a Filipino Richie Valens with his hair all blown out. Finally. All it took was a red-headed white girl who can’t dance with a big voice and B.o.B. to join each other on stage to put together a performance that I really liked. You go Haley.
- First Selena Gomez and now Victoria Justice? Disney Channel is making it hard for 14-year old boys I tell you.
- Justin Bieber finally won an award and if you just started watching, you’d know it was his first. He couldn’t find his way to the stage and nearly went the wrong way after receiving it. Come on, he’s going through puberty! Cut him some slack.
- Cher is on this show, damn near naked in 2010.
- Gaga says the name of her new album is called Born This Way. Well, that sure is going to help dismiss those rumors that she has a pilly packer.
- Kanye’s performing a song with a hook that goes, “Let’s have a toast for the douche bags, let’s have a toast for the assholes, let’s have a toast for the scum bags, everyone of them that I know.”
- He also did some live beat mixing on stage. He was definitely the most intriguing performer of the night. I think he was even on pitch more than Taylor was. Check out the audio of the song below. Good night!
Photo of Chelsea Handler shared through the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.5 Generic license.
Update: Found Kanye’s performance. Here’s hoping it stays up.
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David Bryan and “Memphis” Win Big at the Tonys!
June 13, 2010
Bon Jovi keyboardist David Bryan was always the band’s resident geek. A former pre-med student who left Rutgers to study at Juilliard, he ventured into musical theater in 2002 when he, along with playwright and lyricist Joe DiPietro, started work on a musical called Memphis, the story of a white radio DJ (based loosely on real life DJ Dewey Phillips, one of the first white DJs to play black music) and a black singer who fall in love in the Jim Crow south at the moment of rock ‘n’ roll’s ascendancy. Following several regional theater productions, the show finally opened on Broadway last fall. Tonight, it was nominated for 8 Tony Awards and won four including the night’s top prize for Best Musical. Bryan himself won for Best Score and (with Daryl Waters) Best Orchestrations. Early in the night’s broadcast, Jon Bon Jovi (and an entire Bon Jovi concert audience) wished his bandmate well via satellite. 
And apparently the well-wishes worked. Memphis won out against 11-time nominee Fela!, based on the life and music of Nigerian bandleader Fela Kuti. Among that musical’s many producers were Jay-Z and Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith. Though they left without trophies, the three Fela! producers got a lot of special attention from some of the performers. Lea Michele of Glee serenaded Jay-Z and Beyonce with “Don’t Rain on My Parade”, and, earlier, Douglas Hodge, who went on to win Best Actor in a Leading Role (Musical), playing drag queen Albin in La Cage aux Folles (the part Nathan Lane played in The Birdcage) delivered one of the night’s best laughs when s/he started to take a seat in Will Smith’s lap only to leap suddenly away with a coy glance to his crotch.
The first five minutes of the broadcast looked more like the Grammys than the Tonys, culminating with Green Day‘s appearance on stage to rip through the song “Holiday” with the cast of American Idiot, the musical based on the band’s 2004 concept album. The musical was only nominated for three awards (including Best Musical), and only took home an award for Best Lighting Design. The fourth Best Musical nominee was Million Dollar Quartet, a stage re-creation of a legendary Sun Studios session that brought together Elvis Presley, Jerry Lee Lewis, Carl Perkins, and Johnny Cash for a historic, one-off rockabilly summit in 1956. Levi Kreis, the cast’s Jerry Lee Lewis, won for Best Actor in a Featured Role (Musical).
